THE OLD WOMAN

The old women sat in a big, blue overstuffed recliner with thread bare arms.  A soft white shawl draped her shoulders.  It was hard to tell where her hair stopped and the shawl began.  The shawl was one of the few things she ever knitted and kept for herself.  She was grateful for the warmth.  She was certain Christmas  got colder every year.   So many, many Christmases she had seen.  Her gifts were all the precious memories.

A small child who believed in the magic of Santa, wished for the beautiful doll in the Sears catalog.  Santa never brought that doll because it was just too expensive when you have four little girls to buy dolls for.   The doll he did bring had a faded red paint mark on its back and a crossed eye because it had been knocked loose by one of the numerous children who had loved her and fought over her before she was relegated to the charity box.  The child didn’t care, she wrapped her baby in a worn and faded receiving blanket just the way she saw Mommy do to her new baby sister.

                When she was ten, Mom bought red and green rickrack from Woolworths and trimmed the white dress passed down from her rich cousins.  She felt so proud and happy to have something special for the assembly at school.  Her smile was pure Christmas spirit, no one seemed to notice the un-brushed tangle of curls or the big red wrinkled bow, her contribution to her ensemble.

                Many years there were special gifts at Christmas.  A red faced, plump baby presented himself on Christmas Eve.  Six years later, she gave her husband a gift of a velvet box with a pair of pink headed diaper pins resting on a handwritten card announcing the due date of their daughter.  She named her Angelina because this baby was her special Christmas angel.  Even the first grandchild had a tie to Christmas when her son announced the impending birth at Christmas dinner.    

                One holiday the middle age couple spent the day looking at the snow bent branches of Douglas fir waving in the wind through clouds of steam from the hot tub.  It seemed there was no one else in the world but them.  Her tears blended with the water of the hot tub and he held her until she crying stopped.   Many years of love shared was the gift they gave each other.  They both knew it would be his last Christmas.

                As one Christmas was a farewell another, a few years later, was a new beginning.  They sat in a tiny bed set in London reading love poetry and exchanging shinning wedding rings in a secret ceremony only they witnessed.  The strings of red and green lights glowed on the tiny tree as they celebrated their commitment to a new life together. 

                Many holidays were special for her memories of friends and family who attended her annual Christmas Eve open house and toasted with spiced wine and cups of eggnog after a sumptuous buffet dinner.  She spent days baking all her favorite goodies gathered from a lifetime of collecting recipes from countries she visited.   She always gave a small homemade gift to everyone.

                The kerosene heater glowed red across the room.  The dining room table held a plate filled with homemade cookies and candy.  Beside the plate was a big mug of steamy cocoa with a fat marshmallow.    A tree beside the empty fireplace glowed with red lights reflecting on gold glass balls hanging between ornaments made by children’s loving hands.  One even had a chocolate smudged thumb print on the back.  These were her most precious positions.   

 All was ready for this year’s special guest.  She was nearly deaf  but she had no difficulty hearing the beautiful music that began softly then filled the room with its joyful energy.  Golden light illuminated the beautiful angel standing in front of her as she sat in her recliner chair.  The angel beckoned to her. 

Later Santa came down the chimney.  The room was empty now and the only thing out of place was the white shawl lying on the floor in front of the chair.  He carried no sack of gifts into this house.  The gifts were already here and always had been.  He warmed himself by the heater as he ate the cookies and drank the cocoa.